For Sale: Two Cats, Cheap

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I went outside this morning and watered my garden. In doing so, I got my shoes wet. When I came in, instead of putting my shoes back in the closet I set them near the door so they could dry out, and left the wet socks atop them.
First cat got up and went to do her normal morning judgmental stares at the neighbors walking their dog. She saw items that seemed vaguely familiar to her, but in an unexpected location. After careful consideration, she went and got the other cat for a second opinion on this strange situation. The other cat came over to investigate. Other cat took one look at my shoes, decided they were invading alien monsters, and decided to have a complete mental breakdown that involved climbing up the curtains to hide in an elevated location.
The first cat, being a supportive and loving sister, decided that she wasn’t going to let the other cat go to crazy town alone. Immediately, she decided that the socks must die, and attacked. Her initial attack ripped thread out of the sock. She would have been content with that victory, only the thread tangled around her a little. Thus, when she started to walk away, the sock followed.
Not just followed. The clearly carnivorous sock chased after her with evil intent as she tried in vain to flee. Despite her panic, she knew the only possible thing to do in a situation like this is to start knocking over plants until that human they permit to live in their house saves her.
The curtains have been wounded and were in need of stitches. The sock did not survive. Neither did the newly potted spider plant. They will be mourned.

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